Father's Day

Don't get me wrong, I am all for celebrating my husband as a father. He is a wonderful father. But, try finding a gift for him? He becomes a giant pain in my neck. He is the ultimate "I don't need anything" guy. Gee, thanks. That's really helpful when your kids have been plotting for 2 months. He is a computer guru so buying technology in any form is out. He has some fancy iPod thing that has all his music on it. He hates to be waited on. He is not a clotheshorse. Cook a fancy breakfast for him? Brilliant. Except he is a better cook than I ever hope to be and he enjoys it as a form of relaxation. I announce I'm going to make breakfast for him anyway. Great idea (in theory). Midway through scrambling the eggs, my kids announce they need to call Grandpa. Forgetting about eggs on the stove, I'm refereeing who gets the first turn wishing Grumpy a happy father's day. Paul takes over the eggs. Sheepishly, I inform him that if he'd like sausage with his breakfast, he's safer cooking it himself and saving himself a trip to the ER. We own a coffee pot. I have no idea how to use it. So, Father of the Year has now finished cooking his own eggs, made sausage and coffee for himself. He also got the portion of eggs with the extra eggshells. Yummy. I spoil that boy. I tried to pick up the slack and asked what he'd like for dinner. He looked embarrassed and announced he was making ribeye steaks for us. The man is no fool. He wants a good meal and knows he stands a better chance if he makes it himself. Then came gift giving. In the past, I've given him a child backpack so he can lug our children around on his back and a bike trailer so he can take the kids on bike rides. That's right. His gifts provide him the opportunity to cart our kids around so I don't have to. What can I say? I think of others. This year I got him a double photo frame with a recording device so the kids can record a message for him. Guess who is going to have to figure out how to set it up? Happy Father's Day!