Friday, August 11, 2017

The Disappearing Act

Travel update - almost everyone survived in tact. One person was hospitalized but I am assured my kids had no role in the cause. In one week's time, I will disappear for 3 days and 2 nights with my husband and WITHOUT my children. This will be our first getaway in 5 years. My friends (I hope I can still call them that next week) offered to watch our kids. Well, I made sad eyes, begged, pleaded, cajoled and bribed them. It's the best possible escape. We have free child care, warm weather and I do not have any responsibilities! I do not have to attend a single work function. Bon voyage, so long, farewell, sayonara, eat my dust, folks!!! I am crossing my fingers, praying, lighting candles and hoping that my kids behave reasonably well for the kind folks who have agreed to clothe, house, feed and watch over my kids. I feel like a should prepare an operating manual. Some helpful tips - feed early and often. When in doubt, feed them again. Then throw some snacks at them for extra protection. Do NOT fall for the big, sad, tragic blue eyes. My kids make Puss in Boots like an amateur in the hoodwinking department. Also, they hibernate like bears. When in doubt, tell them to go to sleep. And approach with caution when they are tired or hungry. Or just run the other way. Your motto for 3 days should be "survival at any cost".

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