MOPS

This year, I joined MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). Where has this been for the last 7 years? For those of you unfamiliar with this group, it is a place to find friendship, community, resources and support for mothers so you are not alone. Moms have found community through MOPS for almost 40 years. MOPS holds and shares the collected wisdom of mothers and experts. We meet twice a month, have food, conversation and fabulous guest speakers. If you have a child between ages birth and 5 and like to meet fellow moms and eat good food, check out your local MOPS chapter.

I've met some great women and been inspired by our speakers. The best part? The mommy mess up. That's right. If you are willing to stand up and tell an embarrassing moment as a parent, they reward you with a huge chocolate bar. Any group that gives you chocolate as a condolence prize for being an imperfect mom is tailor made for me. I've gotten that prize a few times this year. I put my child in time out and forgot she was up there. I forgot to pack her lunch. I've yelled at the wrong kid by accident, to name a few of my finer mommy moments.

The women in my group are diverse and interesting. There are parents with 5 kids, special needs kids, adopted kids, step kids, you name it. There are stay at home moms, working moms, older moms, younger moms. We get together, chat, support one another, make each other laugh and inspire each other. I brought dinner to a mom who recently had her 5th child. When I stopped by her house, one child was doing home work and 2 were playing quietly together. Lucky for her, my kids stopped by and created total chaos and anarchy. As she and I chatted, her oldest came up, stood quietly by her side and waited. When there was a pause in the conversation, he politely said "excuse me". True story! This kid actually waited patiently and didn't interrupt. I was floored. I think she needs to have 6 more kids because she is clearly doing something right. When we left, all her kids thanked us for stopping by. I'm trying to convince this tired and busy mom that our kids need to spend more time together. I'm hoping some of that will rub off on mine (and not the other way around).

Just right

I took Sara to get her First Communion pictures taken last weekend. We were both very excited. Paul straightened her hair. She was wearing her baptismal necklace from Uncle Luis, new sparkly shoes and a big smile. When she changed into her dress and veil, the photographer's wife said "wow, she is too skinny. Does she eat?".

Yes, my daughter eats, as most people can attest. She eats anything and everything from clam chowder to zucchini. She is 'blessed' with a high metabolism and boundless energy. Her record was 4 helpings of meatloaf in one sitting. In preschool she would eat lunch at school and then again at home. She has no qualms eating her food then zeroing in on the food of those around her. I don't think my father has eaten his entire meal in the last 7 years. Our friends are accustomed to her begging for food at their homes.

Her pediatrician is fine with her weight. She eats very well and takes vitamins. She is a normal healthy little girl who eats like a horse but burns through her energy. We are very careful not to make weight an issue in our house. She knows I enjoy excercising because I like to be healthy. I don't discuss dieting around her.

My daughter is 7 years old. We monitor what she watches and reads. I don't want her developing a complex about her body. We all know how women are portrayed in the media. We hear about girls developing eating disorders earlier and earlier. Later, Sara asked me if she is too skinny. (ironically, this conversation took place at Moe's, where she devoured her lunch) I explained that her body is just fine and the lady didn't mean anything by it. I'm sure she meant no harm but it planted a little seed of doubt in my daughter's head. Kids should be focused on school, friends and family. At 7 years old, they should not be worried about 'being too skinny'. I want my daughter to focus on being a good and happy child, not worry about being skinny or fat.

Sara is a bright, beautiful, caring, funny girl. She loves to read, swim, dance, cook, write and play. I want her to care about who she is on the inside. I want people to notice her for who she is, not what she looks like. To us, she is beautiful inside and out.

So, here is my 2nd attempt to make life like appear interesting. Sara and I just spent a great weekend back home in Michigan visiting friends and family. One of the few perks of moving is you get to go back home and feel like a celebrity. Everyone want to see you, feed you and entertain you!!! As most of you know, we have a tendency/habit to mooch food wherever we go. This is a skill my kids have perfected. Back home, we once had the pleasure of meeting a neighbor when we were playing outside and Sara (age 2.5) smelled something on the grill, ran to their house, introduced herself and said she was hungry and the food smelled good. A pattern was established and it paved the way to many wonderful friendships. As a result, Sara will eat anything put in front of her (or the person sitting next to her). As she once told our contractor, "you are eating blueberries. I like blueberries and it is nice to share". Lessons to live by. BTW- he gave her ALL the blueberries.

On this visit, Sara was fed by my father (4x), my sister-in-law Angie, the Elmblads, the Tischs, the Jevtics, and I am sure she scored some snacks along the way. We were in town for 3 days. Don't even get me started on all the loot and assorted gifts she received.

Sitting on Amy's patio (our 2nd home) and watching Sara run around our former yard with her friends was heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time. No longer with this be an almost daily occurrence for her. It will happen 2-3 times depending on how often we can get home. (Yes, I still call it home). What I loved most about those summer evening was the casual and impromptu feeling. We would look out the kitchen window, see Amy starting the fire, wander over and have a wonderful evening of laughter and friendship.

I have met some people here but it isn't the same. We are still in the "courtship" phase of friendship. We have to be polite and on our best manners while we get to know each other and each other's personalities. We don't have the easy-going, familiar give and take. I like being able to walk into someone's house, grab a Diet Coke and plunk down on the sofa. I like that my friends at home could show up at my house and I didn't panic that they will be horrified that my dishes are in the sink and toys have taken over every inch of my house.

So, people of Granger, beware. You are welcome in my house but beware what you find. And if you are kind enough to invite me over, you better have some Diet Coke in the fridge!
People of Novi, also beware. We are never gone for long. Stock those fridges with Diet Coke and chocolate.