Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Man Who Breeds Too Much

Desmond Hatchett has been all over the news lately because he has fathered 30 children with 11 women. Move over, Charlie Chaplin. The difference is that Charlie Chaplin (The Little Tramp) could afford to support his offspring. This guys pays as little at $1.49 per child. How did this little tramp con 11 different women into having unprotected sex? What kind of pick-up lines did he use? "Hey, baby, wanna be number 11?" Upon hearing that this loser already has 29 children, what woman in her right mind decides to roll that dice?? At some point, the women in his life should have chipped in for a vasectomy. The gift that does NOT keep giving. Or kept their legs crossed. I live in Indiana, where it seems like everyone has at least 3 kids. I am overwhelmed with 2. But, here is the difference between my neighbors and this deadbeat - these people can actually support their offspring. Can you just imagine Father's Day for this guy? I hope the mothers drop all 30 kids at once and run for the hills. Or Mother's Day? Does the guys spend all day running all over town trying to visit each of his baby mamas? I don't even have a pet because the idea of taking care of one more living thing makes me want to cry. I have a simple rule. Do not have more kids than you can care for, love,and support. And do not even sit near this guy. He is freaky fertile and you may just get knocked up through sheer proximity.

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