Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Is The Grass Really Greener On The Other Side?
I need to keep reminding myself that no one has a perfect life. All around me I see these mothers with fabulous bodies, beautifully kept homes, seemingly perfect husbands/marriages, and well-mannered children. Is it really how it seems? I was recently (falsely) accused of having a neat home. I reminded the accusers that they have only been in my home on scheduled visits. Show up unannounced on my doorstep at your own peril and watch your step. I provided enough photographic evidence of the path of destruction, chaos and mayhem that runs through my house on a daily basis that they vowed to give proper notice before showing up at my home.
And those perfect bodies? Maybe they watch what they eat, exercise daily and have good genes. I envy them a little but I don't begrudge them. I wish I could wave a magic wand and wake up looking like that but I'm realistic. I know that, no matter what, I'm never going to be a size 6. I also know that it won't change my life much. My husband and kids love me no matter what size my jeans are. My friends still like to hang out with me even if I'm not parading around the pool in a size 4 bikini.
The perfect spouse/marriage? Maybe he is a workaholic who never spends time with the kids. Maybe he ditches them every weekend to golf or watch football. Maybe she nags him so much he hides in his man cave.
What about those well mannered children? Maybe they whine, fuss, sass and fight like cats and dogs at home. Maybe they are horrible sleepers and keep their parents up night after night.
Every time I've found myself envying someone's life, I discover some obstacle, some difficulty or some challenge they are facing. I'm reminded that no one lives a perfect or easy life. We simply do the best with what we have.
We only get a glimpse into the lives of people around us. We never get to see the whole picture. I certainly hope no one thinks they know me, my life or my kids based on what they see at the park, pool or grocery store. I'm not raising devils. I'm not raising angels. My husband and my marriage are not perfect but we are happy. We love each other and our kids. We are raising normal kids (I hope).